Relationships

So my new roomate went to work so im sitting here bored out of my mind. So i might as well do my section on relationships like i said i would. Relationships. Hmmm where do i begin. Relationships are hard, trust me. If you feel like your the only person working on the relationship to make it work then you dont appreciate your partner enough. Otherwise you would see that maybe they are putting in more effort than you. Now this may not always be the case so dont take me word for word. Sometimes a little break is best. Sometimes you jsut need some time alone to get back to where you belong mentally. You have to appreciate your partner and what they can do. The two of you have to know each others strengths and weaknesses. And work together. If you dont then yes, there will be complications.
In case you dont believe what im saying let me explain to you my most recent relationship with the love of my life and show you where im coming from. I met this girl when i was homeless. She helped me through everything. And finally got me out of the woods and into a house. Not to long after i finally got a job and was on the way to getting out on my own and maybe supporting her the way she deserves. But like alot of relationships there was some issues. I wont go into detail on the issues because they aren't important. Not to you guys anyways. But her and i started to argue alot, everyday almost. And things started to get worse. I didnt appreciate the things she did for me or how much she tried or how much she really loved me, not as much as i should have anyways. Finally thigns got to rough, to the point to where i questioned our own relationship. That was my first mistake. My second mistake was not trusting her, I let this girl into my heart more than i have ever let anyone, and she did the same for me, yet i didnt trust her enough. I got scared, bc i let alot of people in and they always did me wrong, but she was different, she wouldnt do that to me, and deep down i knew that. But i got scared like most people do who have been hurt, but i didnt tell her. I didnt talk to her about it, if I would have things would have been different. I know they would have. Finally it became to much for me to handle. I tried to talk myself out of it so many times. One day it worked a little. So I started to make plans on how i was going to get my life in a place where i could give her everything she deserved, and this girl deserves the world. I finally came to the realization that maybe a small break would help and give me more time to get things together without having to be slowed down with the temptation to give her everything immediately. (if that made any sense, i knwo she understands it she always understood me) My second huge mistake was not explaining that to her before breaking it off. Otherwise things wouldnt be as bad as they are. My third and final mistake was going off on her. I was torn apart by the accusations that i started doing drugs and drinking and smoking and doing everything i knew to make the pan go away. See she thought i cheated on her, she thought i left her for someone else, she thought i stopped caring and doubted if i ever cared in the first place. It tore me apart so i went off. Said some things that i shouldnt have said. And made everything wose. I have finally got to talk to her and explain everything and maybe one day her and i can get back together but it wont be for a long time. That is if she can ever forgive me, which at this point in time is doubtful and not possible. I hurt her to much.
So take care of your partner, explain your intentions before explaining your decisions. Take care of them, make them happy, because in making your partner happy makes you happy, whether you want to admit it or not. And if you dont think it does make you happy, wait till you loose your significant other, you will see exactly what i mean. Relationships are supposed to be fun, relaxing, enjoyable. Its supposed to be the thing in your life that is like your escape, your "happy place" sort to speak. They are not supposed to be full of anger and regret and hatred, and fear. If you have this in your relationship then you need to talk to your spouse as soon as possible before this gets out of hand and you start to regret not taking this advice sooner. Trust me.

Whitetiger90